Dealing with stress and not being able to meet the deadline
I think that it is important for me to write this post as we are assessed on writing about and clearly showing the progress we have made throughout of project brief. This means that I should write about the areas I have struggled with or found difficult to complete as it is also part of the creative process. I have decided to wait until the project is near it's end for me to write about this as the days before and in are the most stressful part of the process and also this way I could write about everything that has happened throughout the term in a whole instead of adding little chunks in each post. This is basically just a blog post that will be explaining how I have felt throughout the process of BA5 and the areas that I have struggled with.
It is nearing the end of BA5 now and I feel like for a large amount of the project I have felt very mentally and emotionally drained by everything I have had to do. Since being ill on the first work managed to put me behind on work from the get go I feel like it has been a completed madness trying to juggle between the work I needed to catch up on and everything else that needed to be done. As time progressed and I found myself slipping behind on project work I became extremely stressed out about University work, even starting to doubt my own art abilities and fretting about what I could possibly do in the industry. I basically just managed to paint myself into a negative corner which started to affect me emotionally and start to show through in my work. I started to rush things, or not produce pieces to the best of my ability as I felt like everything I was doing wasn't good enough. This was especially the case when it came to the first art test we completed. I just wasn't happy with anything I was creating and this lead my to spend way to much time on everything and not leave enough time for me to finish my 3 environment art pieces which I now have no way of finishing before the deadline tomorrow.
Not leaving myself enough time to do everything is a big problem I faced this term as it has gotten to the night before deadline and I know that there is no way that I can submit everything as I still haven't done large amounts of it which is a horrible thing to admit but it is true. I have had to leave certain things out due to the fact that I know if I spend time working on them now then I will never get anything else done. Certain things I have had to leave are things like creating 2 more race re designs, coming up with more creative promo art than the quick one I put together earlier. Things that I should really have paid more attention to earlier on in the process. I think I added far too much pressure on myself from he beginning of my new term which may have helped to cause my stress breakdown. After reviving a high grade last term I think i had unintentional nagging thoughts in the back of my head that I MUST get the same grade as last time which probably didn't help my confidence at all and just added more un needed stress.
Overall I think I am just disappointed that I allowed myself to get into this anxiety filled state and fall so behind on work. I should have spaced things out and tried to focus a little better on what I was trying to do. But for now, I will just have to keep working towards submission and hope for the best.
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